to all the guys i’ve loved before

Has anyone watched the Netflix original “to all the boys I’ve loved before”? It’s the cutest film but it really made me think. What if I actually did write letters to the guys I’ve had feelings for in the past? What would they say?

To all the guys I’ve loved before:

Sometimes I have to take a step back from the situations I’ve been in, whether relationship wise or not, and remember that everything truly does happen for a reason. Our relationship didn’t work out and I still might not truly know why but I have to believe there is someone or something out there that is making sure all things in the universe are in balance. If we were meant to be, we would be.

Maybe someday in the future we will meet again and the timing will be right or maybe not – but I have to say thank you for the good times we spent together and for the bad times for making me a stronger, better person. I always try to turn everything into a lesson and while I may have over-reacted and acted like my life was ending because you were leaving, I have learned from it and grown from it and when presented with a similar situation in the future I can only hope I react in a better manner.

I also have to say I’m sorry. I’m not sorry for not being good enough because I do believe I am enough and will never seem not good enough to the right person. I’m just sorry for both of us that the situation didn’t turn out to be what we were hoping for. At some point you must have seen something in me or me in you and for whatever reason it didn’t work out. Even if you left me, I am sure there was some difficulty in doing so and I’m sorry if you had to go through that alone.

I wish you the best. Not in a spiteful way, either. I truly wish you the best. I hope that you find exactly what you’re looking for. It may not be me and that’s fine, but you might not have been what I was looking for either, really. So I hope that whoever and whatever they are, you find them and they are everything you are hoping for and more. I hope that our time spent together, no matter how brief, prepared you in someway for that person when they find you so that you are able to welcome them with open arms and soak in all that they are.

I’ll never forget the way you made me feel.
And I miss your dog.

With love from my city to yours,
xo, Steph

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