can you lose something you never had?

I was watching the movie “How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days” and the part where Andie Anderson (Kate Hudson) says “you can’t lose something you never had” really got me thinking. There are too many guys I’ve dated that I never really dated – you know, we “talked” but we never officially dated.

So how come when we stopped hanging out/talking/whatever we stopped doing, it felt like we broke up? How weird is it to mourn the loss of a relationship that was never really a relationship?

Is it possible for us to lose something we never really had? Of course it doesn’t feel like we “never had them” after you invest time in someone and learn things about them, even if you didn’t really date.

I’m here to tell you of course you’re able to lose something you never had, in this scenario of course. You can’t lose your dog if you never had a dog – but I know you understand where I’m going with this. Don’t let people belittle the situation and try to tell you that you never dated so you shouldn’t be upset.

Dating is weird. We spend hours on our phones swiping left and right hoping someone will match with us and ultimately we will go out for drinks or dinner, but we can’t be sad when we lose a relationship just because it isn’t officially a relationship? Weird.

What do you think? Is it possible to lose someone you’ve never even dated? How do you get over it?

With love from my city to yours,

4 thoughts on “can you lose something you never had?

  1. I never thought about it in this term but yes – I believe you can. sometimes a connection with someone has a lot of promise – you can almost SEE what it can become, but somehow circumstances stop it from happening, I think that can hurt at times no less then an actual relationship ending, depending on how attached you got to that person.

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